She Lived Her Best Life

Lived Her Best Life.

I still remember like it was yesterday, the day our friends asked if Mike and I would be Rosie’s Retirement home.  It was a little over 8 years ago, to the day, she came to live down on Back Bay. 

Rosie was bought at an auction, before she was a year old, no one really knows her story or her age, but from the day her first family brought her home, she became ‘The Princess’.  She was loved and cared for by a beautiful family, that had three little girls and Rosie was the center of their world.  Over the years Rosie gave birth to 4 calves, as well as an endless abundance of milk to many families.  As the girls grew older, farming was not a priority as the girls were leaving home, Rosie was aging and they were hopeful we would say yes.

Mike and I looked endlessly for the right barn, hours of thought went into how to make a suitable retirement home for the old girl.  We found the perfect barn (her castle) with the help of friends we were able to make our field suitable for a princess.  

The day finally arrived, Rosie was arriving, I was nervous.  A year before, I decided to get chickens, which Mike always said, ‘chickens are the gateway to livestock’!!  Well, here we are, just like that, we are farmers.  What could possibly go wrong??  I am pretty sure the neighbors all thought I was crazy (I am, just a little), we were going to have a pet cow.  

Rosie settled in quickly, she was approximately 10 at the time, she was full of life, she would run and frolic down through the field, rub up against all the sappy trees, eat all the green grass she could find.  Over the years she had a routine, every morning you would see her standing down in the field watching the sunrise.  Rosie was a presence, she was solid, she was pure magic.  It is easy looking back and realizing that she would always life live on her terms, which I will call complete stubbornness, (I personally understand, stubborn).  She was going to have it her way, ALL THE TIME.  She LOVED attention and our world revolved around her. 

She loved parties, she loved kids, she loved having everyone over to see her magical kingdom.   The Garden Club would come spend the day, they would paint watercolors of her in her barn, feed her romaine lettuce and kale, while surrounded by chickens, birds, butterflies, deer, she was the magic piece that made our property ‘heaven on earth’.  

Over the years Mike and Miss Rosie had a very special relationship, he adored her and the feeling was 100% mutual. He would clean her barn, she would throw around the wheel barrow, she would stand endlessly in his way, he would try to have conversations about why she needed to keep out of his way, but she never really listened, and he knew she would not.  Rosie had a way of ‘knowing’ who was coming down the driveway, and it never failed, the minute Mike was home, she was waiting at the gate for him. Every evening Mike would take her out 4 pink lady apples (her favorite) and he would brush her, there was nothing better than having her coat groomed by the man she loved. 

Rosie was known for only eating ‘approved’ hay, and I assure you, we traveled far to get the hay that she would eat.  I had brought home enough ‘unaccpetable’ bales of hay, that she would go a week without touching what was there, if anyone ever wondered if a cow can give a ‘stink-eye’, YES, YES they can. 

Having a #1100 pet also comes with a few complications.  While Rosie was mostly respectful of the fence, which was basically pretty ribbons that held her in, periodically I would have to turn the electric on, once she figured out there was green grass up the road, she would wander the neighborhood.  She loved visiting the neighbors, she loved nibbling their apple trees, sometimes I think she was looking for love, and sometimes she would just like to leave free fertilizer around.  A few mornings, I would get a random text that Rosie was sleeping on their lawn, or I would look out and someone was walking her home.  Usually, once a year I would get a call at work as Rosie was spotted on snap chat visiting the neighbors barn, and I would rush out of work leaving a patient on my table to get Rosie back home.  She was special, she was funny and she was going to always have it on her terms. One summer morning, when I went to say good morning, she had about 20 porcupine quills sticking right out of the top of her head!!!! ( A cowicorn!!)  I spent the day feeding her apples, and chasing her around with pliers, at the end of the day, I avoided an embarrassing call to the vet!! 

Rosie had a daily routine, in the summer she would lay in one spot down in the field, I always said, “that is her power spot, she's charging the earth”, over the years she had worn the spot bare.  She would meet the sunrise every morning, and her coat would glow orange the second the sun hit her.  She had the most beautiful brown eyes, and in the midst of fall, the black on her face was shaped as a beautiful heart, you could just feel her love by looking at her, it made you feel alive. We should all feel that alive. Although, a few of our trees, that she loved to landscape did not feel alive by the time she was done, we learned to love her attention to detail and tree trimming. She loved our family walks, she loved snacks, she would always amuse us and let Lester take her rope, she just accepted this was part of deal, you just feel how much she loved the two little ‘black sheep’. She was the energy that brought us all together, she was pure love. 

I noticed over the summer, she was starting to slow down, she was starting to look more ‘hippy’ and elderly.  In all honesty, there was always a part of me, that worried about her through the winter.  In the last couple of weeks, she knocked down the fence, roamed the neighborhood, pruned some trees, went for walks, ate plenty of apples, then she decided she was tired.  

In her last week, she hung out in her barn, surrounded by us, Lester and Randy did not leave her side.  As Rosie always made sure life was on her terms, she decided it was her time to go.  It was a very, very hard week, it made me question all the things in my life, reminded me life is short. I spent nights with her in the barn, in the brutal cold, discussing the meaning of life.  I sat with her, knowing she was in charge, I was just holding space for her, this time I will cherish for the rest of my life.  Rosie went to heaven on 12/01/2021, she went peacefully, she was never in distress, she spent her last day soaking up the sunshine with the boys laying right by her, heaven put on a beautiful display for her, as rainbows were glowing next to the sun, she was loved by all the divine.  I have cried many tears, happy tears. 

In reflecting on her life, it was such an honor to give her a place where she could live out her life.  She allowed me to be in her presence, know exactly what it feels like to experience unconditional love and know the gentleness of God’s creatures. She brought life to our home, she could make you smile with her goofy ways.  She was a complete diva, she was a princess.  She will forever hold a very special place in my heart, as I loved sharing her with the world, I love she touched so many lives, she was and always will be the anchor in my life to guide me back to the simple things. Sunshine, green grass, be present in each moment and share your love with the world. Rosie taught me, just to be me, shine no matter what. Thank you for reminding me to enjoy the sunrise every single day.  She was joy, she was love, she was sunshine on a cloudy day. We laid her to rest, in her ‘power spot’, she will forever be remembered in our hearts, the love she shared will forever be a part of my soul.  Your physical presence will be forever missed, but your energy will live on. 

Thank you all for being part of our lives and loving Rosie, and sharing her love.  I promise you, she would love every single one of you. 

“You can’t skip chapters, that is not how life works. You have to read every line, meet every character. You won’t enjoy all of it.  Hell, some chapters will make you cry for weeks. You will read things you don't want to read, you will have moments when you don't want the pages to end. But you have to keep going.  Stories keep the world revolving.  Live yours, don't miss out.” ~unknown 

“Let all that you do be done in love” 

 1 Corinthians 16:14

The Energy Around You and Healing

I sat down this morning to see what type of energy will be coming along in the next couple of weeks. This helps to me to be mindful of signs that occur around me, and help me see the connections that are being made between what I am experiencing on my journey and how it is influenced by the energies around me. So, I pulled cards from a few different oracle card sets that called to me, and as well as speaking to me, they also where meant to share with you.

The first card comes from the Gaia Oracle cards. The card I chose was PEACE - the dissolving unwanted or disturbing thoughts. This card is about “worry”, in a world that continually feels so unsettled, all the time. It is easy to fall into worry or fear, then it manifests in every cell of our bodies. Once this happens, panic sets in. It is a truly vicious cycle. Allow PEACE to sit with you, allow it to settle within you. As this process happens, the energy will start to feel positive and light. Be patient, it is not one of the easiest places to be. Imagine yourself surrounded by love and light, allow your focus to travel to one of your favorite places, be grateful for everything in your life. May your heart be filled with love and surrounded by the love on this earth.

The second card comes from The Native Heart Healing Oracle, The selected card was RECORD KEEPER. The mandala holds the energy of Wisdom and brings forth the divine guidance of the ancient ways. You am being asked to open you heart and listen. Being open to the idea you are not sure what you will hear or feel, but your are being asked to trust that you are moving forward in the way in which you are divinely guided.

The third card comes from the Archangel Micheal Oracle. The card here if FORGIVENESS. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Allow forgiveness into your heart so that you may move forward in love and peace. This one “should” be easy, allowing the emotions to come, forgive and find joy in being free of the weight of your own thoughts. Although this is easy to do, you may have to do it several times over until your heart and mind are in agreement that this is so, with every repetition it becomes easier.

The forth and final card comes from Animal Speak. The card is RAVEN. While I was out on a walk with Lester, I found a Raven’s feather, and here the animal message shows up again. Raven is about transition, energy in motion, it is the keeper of secrets and brings messages between the heavens and earth, when life is difficult. It touches the areas of rebirth and renewal, tearing down and rebuilding, becoming comfortable with oneself, and transforming difficulties into blessings.

We are meant to hear all of these things together for they are all intertwined, having cause and effects on one another. However, you may feel connected to some parts of these cards more than others. How do these cards resonate with you? If you feel draw to one, two or more, why? How do their messages a apply to you? What part of your journey are they drawing you to? Please sit with these messages that are telling you where the energy of the next few weeks can take you. What areas of healing are ready to be addressed in your journey? Be open to the possibilities, and the opportunities that come forth for you.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

Whatever the Weather

Yesterday it was sunny with a warm wind, today is rain that is going to turn into snow as the sun sets, we will wake with a light covering of snow tomorrow morning. The weather here in the northeast changes daily in the spring. It can mimic January to August, in the scope of a few hours, but we know it will never last too long.

We are not fooled by the warmth of the sun, for hours later we can be cover in snow. We know that the northerly wind can freeze water over night till about noon, but it cannot hold on forever. We know that change is what to expect, and even though we may dream warmer days with a warmer breeze before the little black flies hatch, we have to “be” here now.

Weather happens daily, sometimes hourly, some times it rains in the back yard and is sunny in the front (Rainbow Time!!!) But as I just stated, the only time that you can enjoy it is right now. Put on the appropriate gear to keep warm and dry and go enjoy that spring snow storm, go jump in that puddle, go enjoy the sunshine on your skin when that extra layer gets too hot. Go back inside and make tea and soups when the rain makes you cold.

Enjoy the little things that the weather brings to your senses. The warm woolly smell of a sweater, mud tugging on your boots and knowing your feet are dry, bare feet in a barely warm garden, wearing layers that keep you just right in the sun, laying on the ground with the smell of spring earth and last years grasses breaking down, being drowsy and just wanting a little nap. Running for the house in a spring rain shower, but not really upset that you are getting wet, or possibly because it’s absolutely freezing.

What on earth is she getting at you ask?

The moments of nature that you can experience are many and vast, these are just a few I experienced in one day this week. Each moment was fleeting, but they where all joyous, some of it blissful, some allowed for me to be a participant in creating spring in my garden. Other moments had me sheltering indoors, nourishing my body with foods and warmth. Not every moment was comfortable, but I am aware that I am blessed to be able to change my situation, here I could seek the shelter that I needed and then rejoin nature outdoors when the weather changed.

Change allows the discomfort to lead you to where you need to be, or comfort in a new setting, to find the joy, or what makes your soul content. Change is inevitable, it always is. Sometimes change is rapid and sometimes it is slow in coming, but it is coming. Nothing in nature is meant to stay stagnant. In the Spring, the changes in the weather are rapid, so is growth during this time. There changes are not limited to the weather and plant growth, it applies to us as well.

The changes of this spring’s awakening have not been comfortable, but if this were not so, changes that are so baldly needed would not be happening. Changes that give us opportunities to assist in our healing, finding comfort, rest, and growth. These changes are occurring for all of us. Our bodies are being asked to move and get out after the quiet state of winter, and then were thrown into energetically charged time of refection earlier this year. Now, now we get to move forward, just like the Earth in Spring.

How is your journey reflecting the season?

Are you accommodating changes or fighting them?

Have you stopped for a moment to see what possibilities change is trying to bring you too?

You do not have to know the answers to these questions, but maybe give yourself some time in nature, or while you’re sheltering from it to maybe sit with them, and see what opportunities are within the changes that are coming your way.

All My Best

Sitting with Discomfort

The energy that we have received in this past month, is comparable to the winds that have started off this month of March. In this last month, I personally have received so many personal challenges, and they were indeed designed for me alone. There have been things I needed to slow down for, changes I needed to make to be able to move forward in my endeavors, and even some personal issues that I needed to come to terms with.

However, the energy that was there for me to work with, made it understood that under no certain circumstances could I proceed without doing the work. There was no way forward until I had completed what needed to be done. Things broke, posts wouldn’t go up, deadlines were not met and even getting sick for a short time. These lessons also came hard and fast, one right after the other, not allowing me to ignore them for very long.

I needed to stop and look at why things were not working, what things were broken and preventing me from moving forward, why would those blog posts just not go up without a hitch, what was actually being missed when I couldn’t meet a deadline or what things were not being done when I needed to rest and care for myself instead.

What actually needed to change, was the mindset I was in. We know that we cannot proceed as we always have if change is what we seek. However, sometimes we become stubborn and try to force needed changes and then remain who we always have been. This is not possible. New understandings change us little by little, there is always some loss for who we were and beliefs that we have held on to so dearly and for so long. This is okay, as a matter of fact, if you don’t feel their loss, there may be a chance you don’t actually let them go…and you will indeed receive the lesson again.

Sitting with these discomforts, and being in a place readying yourself to make changes are the lessons. The universe wants you to be successful, find that new path, new opportunities, new ideas, and new ways to create love and joy. Acknowledging pain and discomfort and making choices to not stay there will bring forth the new paths you will walk as spring arrives and we welcome the changes and renewal that it affords us.

Please keep up the hard work, it is doing you so much good and creating the love that is essential for life.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

A Bit of Spring’s Energy is Being Felt

Movement is beginning once again, the stillness of winter is beginning to wane and this year,  spring’s energy is coming in with a bang!

My morning routine is full of spilled water, tea and smoothies.  I have dropped nearly everything that I have tried picking up at least once. Lester Whoodle is running through the house with an entire roll of toilet paper, and Randy the Sheep has learned to open the door from the outside, however closing the door is not something he worries about.  A light bulb blows and my phone is dinging for attention.

Out of the corner of my eye is see the sun is rising, so I leave it all to witness the beauty and of course take a picture too.

Do you see chaos or lessons? Both?

Well, I acknowledge that there is chaos, but my response is what makes all of the difference.

Where does my attention go, what do I give my energy too? These answers are choices, ones that make my day happy-go-lucky or go horribly wrong. It has everything to do with ME. I choose to focus on the beauty of nature, the love of my animals and trust myself to get everything back into place in my own time.  And I am okay with that. I don’t always make the best choice, so consequences and lessons insue then as well. Somedays there is just too much chaos for me to handle. Sometimes it goes badly, and I need to regroup and then trust myself again to get everything back into place, in my own time. And I am okay with that too!

We are at that time of year when the stillness of winter is beginning to shift into the energy of spring. New growth on every level brings in so much energy to push things moving in a forward direction, that it does not always look “pretty.”  The new pushing the old out, clearing the way for new life, new directions, new healing, and such. So, soon our bodies, physical surroundings, mental space, and spiritual needs are going to shift, “cleaning house” so to speak.

So, as spring nears and your body is clearing and purging what needs to be released... When you have the need to clean your home at 1 am and rearrange every room you have...

When you find yourself needing to be making life choices and are dealing with hard change and hard work... When you are asking God and all of the Angels for support… How are you going to respond to this change?  Are you going to take these opportunities for release and change to move forward with your life and healing? Or are you going to view them as “your latest setback”? It truly is up to you!

As you catch yourself in the chaos, take a moment to breathe, remember that choice is always yours to keep moving forward and find yourself embracing the chaos, and just smile. It’s all part of the journey.

All My Best

Dr. Nicole