She Lived Her Best Life

Lived Her Best Life.

I still remember like it was yesterday, the day our friends asked if Mike and I would be Rosie’s Retirement home.  It was a little over 8 years ago, to the day, she came to live down on Back Bay. 

Rosie was bought at an auction, before she was a year old, no one really knows her story or her age, but from the day her first family brought her home, she became ‘The Princess’.  She was loved and cared for by a beautiful family, that had three little girls and Rosie was the center of their world.  Over the years Rosie gave birth to 4 calves, as well as an endless abundance of milk to many families.  As the girls grew older, farming was not a priority as the girls were leaving home, Rosie was aging and they were hopeful we would say yes.

Mike and I looked endlessly for the right barn, hours of thought went into how to make a suitable retirement home for the old girl.  We found the perfect barn (her castle) with the help of friends we were able to make our field suitable for a princess.  

The day finally arrived, Rosie was arriving, I was nervous.  A year before, I decided to get chickens, which Mike always said, ‘chickens are the gateway to livestock’!!  Well, here we are, just like that, we are farmers.  What could possibly go wrong??  I am pretty sure the neighbors all thought I was crazy (I am, just a little), we were going to have a pet cow.  

Rosie settled in quickly, she was approximately 10 at the time, she was full of life, she would run and frolic down through the field, rub up against all the sappy trees, eat all the green grass she could find.  Over the years she had a routine, every morning you would see her standing down in the field watching the sunrise.  Rosie was a presence, she was solid, she was pure magic.  It is easy looking back and realizing that she would always life live on her terms, which I will call complete stubbornness, (I personally understand, stubborn).  She was going to have it her way, ALL THE TIME.  She LOVED attention and our world revolved around her. 

She loved parties, she loved kids, she loved having everyone over to see her magical kingdom.   The Garden Club would come spend the day, they would paint watercolors of her in her barn, feed her romaine lettuce and kale, while surrounded by chickens, birds, butterflies, deer, she was the magic piece that made our property ‘heaven on earth’.  

Over the years Mike and Miss Rosie had a very special relationship, he adored her and the feeling was 100% mutual. He would clean her barn, she would throw around the wheel barrow, she would stand endlessly in his way, he would try to have conversations about why she needed to keep out of his way, but she never really listened, and he knew she would not.  Rosie had a way of ‘knowing’ who was coming down the driveway, and it never failed, the minute Mike was home, she was waiting at the gate for him. Every evening Mike would take her out 4 pink lady apples (her favorite) and he would brush her, there was nothing better than having her coat groomed by the man she loved. 

Rosie was known for only eating ‘approved’ hay, and I assure you, we traveled far to get the hay that she would eat.  I had brought home enough ‘unaccpetable’ bales of hay, that she would go a week without touching what was there, if anyone ever wondered if a cow can give a ‘stink-eye’, YES, YES they can. 

Having a #1100 pet also comes with a few complications.  While Rosie was mostly respectful of the fence, which was basically pretty ribbons that held her in, periodically I would have to turn the electric on, once she figured out there was green grass up the road, she would wander the neighborhood.  She loved visiting the neighbors, she loved nibbling their apple trees, sometimes I think she was looking for love, and sometimes she would just like to leave free fertilizer around.  A few mornings, I would get a random text that Rosie was sleeping on their lawn, or I would look out and someone was walking her home.  Usually, once a year I would get a call at work as Rosie was spotted on snap chat visiting the neighbors barn, and I would rush out of work leaving a patient on my table to get Rosie back home.  She was special, she was funny and she was going to always have it on her terms. One summer morning, when I went to say good morning, she had about 20 porcupine quills sticking right out of the top of her head!!!! ( A cowicorn!!)  I spent the day feeding her apples, and chasing her around with pliers, at the end of the day, I avoided an embarrassing call to the vet!! 

Rosie had a daily routine, in the summer she would lay in one spot down in the field, I always said, “that is her power spot, she's charging the earth”, over the years she had worn the spot bare.  She would meet the sunrise every morning, and her coat would glow orange the second the sun hit her.  She had the most beautiful brown eyes, and in the midst of fall, the black on her face was shaped as a beautiful heart, you could just feel her love by looking at her, it made you feel alive. We should all feel that alive. Although, a few of our trees, that she loved to landscape did not feel alive by the time she was done, we learned to love her attention to detail and tree trimming. She loved our family walks, she loved snacks, she would always amuse us and let Lester take her rope, she just accepted this was part of deal, you just feel how much she loved the two little ‘black sheep’. She was the energy that brought us all together, she was pure love. 

I noticed over the summer, she was starting to slow down, she was starting to look more ‘hippy’ and elderly.  In all honesty, there was always a part of me, that worried about her through the winter.  In the last couple of weeks, she knocked down the fence, roamed the neighborhood, pruned some trees, went for walks, ate plenty of apples, then she decided she was tired.  

In her last week, she hung out in her barn, surrounded by us, Lester and Randy did not leave her side.  As Rosie always made sure life was on her terms, she decided it was her time to go.  It was a very, very hard week, it made me question all the things in my life, reminded me life is short. I spent nights with her in the barn, in the brutal cold, discussing the meaning of life.  I sat with her, knowing she was in charge, I was just holding space for her, this time I will cherish for the rest of my life.  Rosie went to heaven on 12/01/2021, she went peacefully, she was never in distress, she spent her last day soaking up the sunshine with the boys laying right by her, heaven put on a beautiful display for her, as rainbows were glowing next to the sun, she was loved by all the divine.  I have cried many tears, happy tears. 

In reflecting on her life, it was such an honor to give her a place where she could live out her life.  She allowed me to be in her presence, know exactly what it feels like to experience unconditional love and know the gentleness of God’s creatures. She brought life to our home, she could make you smile with her goofy ways.  She was a complete diva, she was a princess.  She will forever hold a very special place in my heart, as I loved sharing her with the world, I love she touched so many lives, she was and always will be the anchor in my life to guide me back to the simple things. Sunshine, green grass, be present in each moment and share your love with the world. Rosie taught me, just to be me, shine no matter what. Thank you for reminding me to enjoy the sunrise every single day.  She was joy, she was love, she was sunshine on a cloudy day. We laid her to rest, in her ‘power spot’, she will forever be remembered in our hearts, the love she shared will forever be a part of my soul.  Your physical presence will be forever missed, but your energy will live on. 

Thank you all for being part of our lives and loving Rosie, and sharing her love.  I promise you, she would love every single one of you. 

“You can’t skip chapters, that is not how life works. You have to read every line, meet every character. You won’t enjoy all of it.  Hell, some chapters will make you cry for weeks. You will read things you don't want to read, you will have moments when you don't want the pages to end. But you have to keep going.  Stories keep the world revolving.  Live yours, don't miss out.” ~unknown 

“Let all that you do be done in love” 

 1 Corinthians 16:14

The Energy Around You and Healing

I sat down this morning to see what type of energy will be coming along in the next couple of weeks. This helps to me to be mindful of signs that occur around me, and help me see the connections that are being made between what I am experiencing on my journey and how it is influenced by the energies around me. So, I pulled cards from a few different oracle card sets that called to me, and as well as speaking to me, they also where meant to share with you.

The first card comes from the Gaia Oracle cards. The card I chose was PEACE - the dissolving unwanted or disturbing thoughts. This card is about “worry”, in a world that continually feels so unsettled, all the time. It is easy to fall into worry or fear, then it manifests in every cell of our bodies. Once this happens, panic sets in. It is a truly vicious cycle. Allow PEACE to sit with you, allow it to settle within you. As this process happens, the energy will start to feel positive and light. Be patient, it is not one of the easiest places to be. Imagine yourself surrounded by love and light, allow your focus to travel to one of your favorite places, be grateful for everything in your life. May your heart be filled with love and surrounded by the love on this earth.

The second card comes from The Native Heart Healing Oracle, The selected card was RECORD KEEPER. The mandala holds the energy of Wisdom and brings forth the divine guidance of the ancient ways. You am being asked to open you heart and listen. Being open to the idea you are not sure what you will hear or feel, but your are being asked to trust that you are moving forward in the way in which you are divinely guided.

The third card comes from the Archangel Micheal Oracle. The card here if FORGIVENESS. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Allow forgiveness into your heart so that you may move forward in love and peace. This one “should” be easy, allowing the emotions to come, forgive and find joy in being free of the weight of your own thoughts. Although this is easy to do, you may have to do it several times over until your heart and mind are in agreement that this is so, with every repetition it becomes easier.

The forth and final card comes from Animal Speak. The card is RAVEN. While I was out on a walk with Lester, I found a Raven’s feather, and here the animal message shows up again. Raven is about transition, energy in motion, it is the keeper of secrets and brings messages between the heavens and earth, when life is difficult. It touches the areas of rebirth and renewal, tearing down and rebuilding, becoming comfortable with oneself, and transforming difficulties into blessings.

We are meant to hear all of these things together for they are all intertwined, having cause and effects on one another. However, you may feel connected to some parts of these cards more than others. How do these cards resonate with you? If you feel draw to one, two or more, why? How do their messages a apply to you? What part of your journey are they drawing you to? Please sit with these messages that are telling you where the energy of the next few weeks can take you. What areas of healing are ready to be addressed in your journey? Be open to the possibilities, and the opportunities that come forth for you.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

What the animals are saying…

We have welcomed the calendar years entrance into Spring. We all have different times and ways Spring announces it’s arrival where we live. Have you noticed all the shifts in nature that is coming with this season? Here, not only has the sap begun to move from the roots of trees to bring life to it’s branches and buds are beginning to appear, but animals have started to show themselves everywhere. Coming out from hiding or from the south. They are all here now, out in full force.

I was trying to think back to the time that this book, Animal-Speak, The Spiritual and Magical Powers of Creatures Great and Small by Ted Andrews, came to me. The exact moment has not returned to my memory, most likely because it is not relevant, but what is important is that this book has traveled many miles with me. On many hikes, many island visits, may camping trips and I’ve slept with it right under my pillow for immediate reach when it’s needed. This book and information within keeps me connected to my soul and my spirit.

In many shamanic traditions they have a journey to find you spirit animal is a part of learning the way of the elders. For thousands of years we have lived in among many, many different animals on this planet. We have watched their patterns, their paths and have “listened” to what they have to tell us. They have messages about the weather, predators, and life patterns. Within the teachings of this book I have truly witnessed and learned many lessons about what animals are here telling me. Most importantly, what insights they have for me about myself.

Enjoy this book, embrace this book. If it speaks to you, allow yourself to find your spirit animal or animals. Seek the messages that are here for you, today and always.

Signs of Spring

I went out to do my morning barn chores this morning, and there was 3 extra inches of grass that has emerged from underneath the snow, and some of it is even green! Every morning now the grass area will get bigger as the snow recedes.

As I open up the chicken coop for the day, I hear a hen clucking, they are starting to lay again. I wonder if I will have a clutch hidden on me again this year and have baby chicks seem to pop up out of no where.

I look out at out towards the pond as I close the coop door and I realize that the Canadian geese that come every year are probably not far way now. I love when they return again to swim, explore, call to each other, and raise their young.

I pass the my garden that is laden with snow, and ponder the arrangement of veggies that I grew last year, and where they will need to go this year, and did I remember to order the last couple of seed packets that I wanted to try…

The walk way to the barn is changing from ice and snow to a bit of mud. I let Rosie the cow and Randy the sheep out for the day. Rosie will have green grass to munch instead of just hay she has had for the last few months, and soon Randy will need shearing.

The list of changes that comes with the arrival of spring runs through my head: the violets and johnny jump-ups, the cats chewing on plants started inside, the shrubs blooming, how to keep Randy from eating all the flowers, robins hopping and flying about he ground and trees, the mud that will be here for a couple of weeks, the grass that will need mowing soon after that. So many things are about to happen!

But for now I stop to inhale the smell of spring that is on the breeze, the energy that is coming from the earth as it wakes, and the possibility of life that is awaiting to “Spring” forth. I will enjoy witnessing each of these things in there own time. Until then the excitement of the Earth awakening resides in me as well.

What are you waiting to see or feel this spring?

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

20 Hawks

Ever have a time when a few chapters in your life where everything feels stagnant? No matter how much you try to meditate, try to change your surroundings, fight off the urge to run, basically just try to see things differently, just to feel something that is different than the “funk” surrounding you, the “funk” that is within you? It is difficult to sit with your own energy, especially when the world around us feels like a slow hamster wheel.

I have been lost many times along my way, and while I do manage to spend time every single day outside due to the needs of my animals I don’t always take enough time to just be in my surroundings, soaking in the messages from nature.

Have you ever been traveling somewhere and seen a bird, deer, dragonfly or raccoon? Did you ever take a moment to think in that the exact moment about the message that came along with seeing that animal? Being present in the moment is the best way to allow your energy to be open to receive the spiritual gifts that are presenting themselves to you.

Last month, the energy during Mercury Retrograde was heavy for some, almost feel like having blinders on, or basically treading water. It was during this time spirit reminded me to take time to be in my surroundings, to “see” what animals and messages that where coming my way.

It was a random day of the week, it felt no different than any other day, except I noticed a hawk sitting in a tree. All of a sudden my heart felt lighter. I felt my energy shift, as hawks represent the ability to use intuition and higher vision in order to complete tasks or make important decisions. Within an hour and a half, I had seen 14 hawks, and by the time the sunset, I had seen a total of 20.

Up until that day, I had been feeling stuck. These bird messengers gifted me with a new perspective, a sense of clarity and a big hug from the spirit world and beyond that there is never a moment my soul is left alone. It was extremely powerful, and a reminder to be present, to keep you heart open and be willing to be uncomfortable in your own skin, for it is a way to shed off a few energetical layers to reveal something new.

While I have my own spirit animal through my shamanic work, every encounter I have is a message from the spirit world and is gifting me a piece of wisdom I need to have in my life. Take a deep breath, ask for help when you need, look around and you will be surprised what you see.

Let me tell you about Miss Rosie…

Miss Rosie was rescued when she was about 10 months old, she is now 16.  Miss Rosie spent 10 years of her life on a downeast farm where she was the family milk cow. Chances are if you lived in Downeast Maine during this time, you had milk from Rosie.  She was treated like a queen, she had three little girls who grew up painting her hooves and dressing her up.  Rosie had 4 calves over the years and she became the “farm pet.”  As the children grew and life changed, the family decided not to have a farm anymore, it was a Full Time Job, and they were adjusting to their family’s growing needs. They thought long and hard about “what to do with their beloved Rosie.

That is where Mike and I enter the picture.  The family asked if we could give Rosie a “retirement home”.  Besides having some backyard chickens, which is a blog for another day, we decided to welcome Rosie to our home.  Neither of us ever had livestock, I actually grew up in the city, and honestly we had no idea what we were getting ourselves into, but we were all in. 

We got Miss Rosie a barn, I painted her some signs and  made it her home. We learned that the Feed and Seed was now our favorite new place to shop for the essentials for a queen. In the years Rosie has been retired I have learned many more things… It’s her way or NO way.  During the winter she will not come out of her barn, unless you bring snacks and snowshoe her a path.  In the summer she prefers two fans, as one requires her to turn back and forth from her face to her bum, but if she has two it’s almost like AC.  She loves apples, she loves scratching her neck on all the trees, she hates fly spray, will tolerate a bandana, and will never turn down a brushing.  She loves when the school bus shows up with a group of kids, and on those days it’s always about her.  Rosie has also enjoyed the garden club, when they came she was a star, and the flowers decorated her. There also was another group of artists that brought their easels and paints and sure enough Rosie did not disappoint. 

Rosie also happily goes for walks, and she never turns down attention. She is very social.  I learned that Rosie loves men, I mean LOVES them.  She turns into a total flirt, her head down and kicking up dirt and then blowing at them all. I have left patients laying on my chiropractic table because the neighbor called and Rosie was out running the neighborhood. 

Rosie’s great to talk to if you need a good cry. She can take all of your weight, give you warmth, and always listens until you are good and done with all that you have to say. Rosie has listened to it all, all my woes and all my excitement. Rosie will endlessly “help” Mike clean her stall, but she likes it done her way. I assure you that Mike’s words are sometimes colorful, but she just lets his words go, and keeps right along “helping” in her own special way,

Rosie has been a pure joy, I have looked out and seen her playing with the deer, I have pulled porcupine quills out of her head, but I told her she made the best cow-icorn ever.  She’s one of the loves of our lives, she’s a rock to anchor us, she makes sure we get out everyday and most days lets me process my day with her, aloud or to myself, but I’m there in the barn with her.  She gives me the space to bring me back to myself. There has not been a minute we have not enjoyed her spirit and energy around our home, and she helps make our house, home. 

When people ask what do you have for pets? I have a list that I go through and when I get to Rosie I say, “We have a 1,200 lb dog.” 

“All My Best.” - Dr Nicole

My First Sign Of Spring

I’ve been waiting for the first robin of spring.

I’ve seen the water running underneath its crust of ice, mosses starting to become a brighter green, seen the ground heave and have had the frost crunch and sink under my feet. Still, I’m waiting for that first robin of spring.

I find myself inquiring if anyone else has seen this elusive sight of spring? I have received a lot of no’s and not yet, but many recall maybe that they have heard a friend make mention of it.

I go for walks, start the yearly clean-up of the backyard, and greet the sun while listening to all of the song birds, waiting to hear the robin join in…not yet, I’m still waiting, where is that first robin of spring?

It’s been warm enough to hang out laundry - twice, baby chicks and ducklings should be here next week, and the seeds that my family have planted have all germinated inside, right next to our sunniest window. There is still not a robin insight.

So, today I’ve done the animal chores, checked the email situation, made breakfast, and started to think that it maybe nice enough again to hand out some laundry, oh no I didn’t start the machine…as I walk to the laundry room and glance out the window…oh my, yes!!! There he is! I look about the house to inform everyone that it has finally happened, the robins are returning! Spring is here! There’s one in the garden! However, no one is about at this moment, it’s mine alone, a meeting of Spring just for me. I walk outside, hoping that he is still there, and he is…all in his red-breasted glory, hopping about my dormant garden.

Right now all signs of Spring are to the contrary, snow starts to spit and there are even bits of hail coming down, but I find that my soul is taking solace in this moment. The robin hops and pecks about the bark mulch bordering my garden, gives a quick chirp and a nod, then he is off. I relax and sit in the quiet of this moment, wipe the snow that’s leaving wet, cold kisses on my cheeks and know that spring is on its way.

Maybe next time the robin will be here long enough to pose for a photo, until then I await his return.

What is your sign that Spring is finally here?

Sitting with Discomfort

The energy that we have received in this past month, is comparable to the winds that have started off this month of March. In this last month, I personally have received so many personal challenges, and they were indeed designed for me alone. There have been things I needed to slow down for, changes I needed to make to be able to move forward in my endeavors, and even some personal issues that I needed to come to terms with.

However, the energy that was there for me to work with, made it understood that under no certain circumstances could I proceed without doing the work. There was no way forward until I had completed what needed to be done. Things broke, posts wouldn’t go up, deadlines were not met and even getting sick for a short time. These lessons also came hard and fast, one right after the other, not allowing me to ignore them for very long.

I needed to stop and look at why things were not working, what things were broken and preventing me from moving forward, why would those blog posts just not go up without a hitch, what was actually being missed when I couldn’t meet a deadline or what things were not being done when I needed to rest and care for myself instead.

What actually needed to change, was the mindset I was in. We know that we cannot proceed as we always have if change is what we seek. However, sometimes we become stubborn and try to force needed changes and then remain who we always have been. This is not possible. New understandings change us little by little, there is always some loss for who we were and beliefs that we have held on to so dearly and for so long. This is okay, as a matter of fact, if you don’t feel their loss, there may be a chance you don’t actually let them go…and you will indeed receive the lesson again.

Sitting with these discomforts, and being in a place readying yourself to make changes are the lessons. The universe wants you to be successful, find that new path, new opportunities, new ideas, and new ways to create love and joy. Acknowledging pain and discomfort and making choices to not stay there will bring forth the new paths you will walk as spring arrives and we welcome the changes and renewal that it affords us.

Please keep up the hard work, it is doing you so much good and creating the love that is essential for life.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole

A Bit of Spring’s Energy is Being Felt

Movement is beginning once again, the stillness of winter is beginning to wane and this year,  spring’s energy is coming in with a bang!

My morning routine is full of spilled water, tea and smoothies.  I have dropped nearly everything that I have tried picking up at least once. Lester Whoodle is running through the house with an entire roll of toilet paper, and Randy the Sheep has learned to open the door from the outside, however closing the door is not something he worries about.  A light bulb blows and my phone is dinging for attention.

Out of the corner of my eye is see the sun is rising, so I leave it all to witness the beauty and of course take a picture too.

Do you see chaos or lessons? Both?

Well, I acknowledge that there is chaos, but my response is what makes all of the difference.

Where does my attention go, what do I give my energy too? These answers are choices, ones that make my day happy-go-lucky or go horribly wrong. It has everything to do with ME. I choose to focus on the beauty of nature, the love of my animals and trust myself to get everything back into place in my own time.  And I am okay with that. I don’t always make the best choice, so consequences and lessons insue then as well. Somedays there is just too much chaos for me to handle. Sometimes it goes badly, and I need to regroup and then trust myself again to get everything back into place, in my own time. And I am okay with that too!

We are at that time of year when the stillness of winter is beginning to shift into the energy of spring. New growth on every level brings in so much energy to push things moving in a forward direction, that it does not always look “pretty.”  The new pushing the old out, clearing the way for new life, new directions, new healing, and such. So, soon our bodies, physical surroundings, mental space, and spiritual needs are going to shift, “cleaning house” so to speak.

So, as spring nears and your body is clearing and purging what needs to be released... When you have the need to clean your home at 1 am and rearrange every room you have...

When you find yourself needing to be making life choices and are dealing with hard change and hard work... When you are asking God and all of the Angels for support… How are you going to respond to this change?  Are you going to take these opportunities for release and change to move forward with your life and healing? Or are you going to view them as “your latest setback”? It truly is up to you!

As you catch yourself in the chaos, take a moment to breathe, remember that choice is always yours to keep moving forward and find yourself embracing the chaos, and just smile. It’s all part of the journey.

All My Best

Dr. Nicole

Seek Out the Joy!

As January ends, winter has set in and the energy that surrounds us has slowed our paces considerably. Enough so we can take stock of where we are and where we would like to be going. As we have slowed we have been able to see our surroundings for what they are, and what place we have among them. To assess the tools that are at our disposal and what we have to assist ourselves in what we would like to manifest and create for ourselves.

Making plans to move forward through this year are becoming more clear as the days pass. just ask my little black sheep Randy, who has decided he is coming into the house for love and companionship, as well as going for rides in the truck to see what else is in our small part of the world (just like his “brother” Lester the Whoodle)…the universe seems to be clearing the way for the life he wants too…

What changes do you want to see in your surroundings, yourself, and your healing journey?

What tools do you have to assist in these changes?

Are you willing to do the work you need and let change happen as the universe sees fit? Or are you going to try to force things (and by the way, how’s that been going for you so far?)

These plans that we make for our hopes and dreams every year affect every aspect of our lives. Seeds are sown every spring, literally and figuratively and grow into fruition, or not depending on the tools and care that we implement. Do we accept that we need to put in the work to cultivate these outcomes? To learn, to work at things daily, and then take ownership and delight in the outcome of that daily work?

My little black sheep Randy, who despite having a foot that did not form in the normally learned how to walk, then run and then climb steps to get to a door. He didn’t stop there, he learned how to open a door with his mouth to join his best friend and brother Lester, for shenanigans in the house.

This sweet little lamb has a plan, to get inside and play (and is now attempting to also get in the truck for rides) and is willing to learn to get to where his little heart wants to be. He is opening doors to my heart, our home and possibilities for himself that I never imagined happing (okay to be honest, I may have imagined them, but not in the short span of a couple of months.)

Maybe that is a place that we can join him on his journey and start doing what we need to, to create the life we would like to have. To seek out and find our joy, make our hearts and souls happy.

Right now, at this time of year, is where we decide how we are going to move forward. Choosing our tools, creative being, and attitudes that will move us into spring.

I am sending you all love and hope you open your own doors to love, joy, happiness and compassion.

All My Best,

Dr. Nicole and Randy too!